Having a financial temper tantrum?

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Dennise Williams




Money can bring about a wide range of emotions.  When you get your paycheque, you may feel happy or dissatisfied.  When someone takes forever to pay you, annoyance can grow and grow.  What about when you get a nice windfall? If it is a small windfall, you may feel ok.  If it is the lotto…well, fantastic feeling, right? Except most lottery winners end up back at the same place or in a worse financial situation than before. So after the initial joy wears off, many lotto winners experience confusion, fear, guilt for being better off than family and friends.


And what about the everyday emotions of money? What is that voice in your head telling you everytime cash passes through your hand? Does it say, “hold tight, don’t let go!”  Or does it say, “Bye”?  And how does that make you feel? For some of us, we may have a financial temper tantrum just like a toddler.


Life coach Abby Eagle asks, “Have emotions/feelings such as fear, stress, anger, hurt, greed etc. ever caused you to make a rash decision, caused a loss of income, affected your health or harmed your life or your business in any way?”  Eagle writes that fear, greed and anger are three prime emotions that result in the financial temper tantrums in our life.


And this results in fear, nervousness, procrastination or panic ever caused you stress or prevented you from making a phone call, speaking to a group of people, flying in an aeroplane, doing your job or just having fun?

And what is the result of understanding you emotions? Well, Eagle writes that managing negative emotions/feelings means an individual can achieve success at a higher level and an organisation can perform closer to peak efficiency. The bottom line is increased job satisfaction and bigger profits.


So what should you do to manage your emotions?  NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) techniques can be powerfully effective in changing how you experience the world—and, since our thoughts and feelings shape our reality, this means that these techniques can actually transform your entire life.


  1. Dissociation
  • Identify the emotion (e.g. fear, rage, discomfort, dislike of a situation) that you want to get rid of.
  • Imagine yourself encountering the entire circumstance from an observer’s perspective.


  1. Content Reframing

Try this situation when you feel powerless or angry, as it helps to empower you by changing the meaning of the experience. Say, for example, that your relationship ends—that seems awful, but try to see it from different perspectives.


  1. Anchoring Yourself

Anchoring yourself helps you to associate a particular, positive emotional response with a particular phrase or sensation. When you choose a positive emotion or thought and deliberately connect it to a simple gesture, you can activate this anchor any time you’re feeling low, and your feelings will immediately start to change.


  1. Belief Changing

Say, for example, that you’ve had a difficult boss and start thinking that all your bosses will make life hard for you.   To change that limiting belief, you first need to start gathering more positive facts about the relevant situation than negative ones. For example, you might read about good experiences people have had with their bosses, reflect on previous bosses who have treated you well, and remember your good friends who have managerial roles.


It’s also smart to affirm the opposite to your limiting belief every day. For example, you might say “I will find a great place to work, and I’ll have a boss who supports me” every morning. Really focus on the words and understand their meaning.


The new beliefs will go straight into your unconscious through this process, and after 30 days of repetition you should start to see a real difference.


So the ball is in your court.  What is it worth to better manage your emotions in respect of your career, business, health and personal relationships? What have negative emotions cost you already in dollar terms? Don’t go alone.  It may be time to reach out to a life coach, financial advisor or counselor for support.

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